I have been a trail runner for most of my life and started running ultras nearly 20 years ago. Throughout my running career, I’ve had amazing adventures, opportunities to test my limits and travel all over the country for races, gained friends and made stronger connections. I even met my husband through trail running. More importantly, the trails and the community who shares them, have been my emotional support for years and helped me through many tough times.
During the COVID pandemic, when much of the world was shut down and my work stress was at an all-time high, I was fortunate to establish a training “bubble” with a few fellow trail runners. Most days, I would leave an exhausting day at work and meet two ladies at the trailhead for some much-needed mileage. The conversation and support gained throughout those runs were the most valuable parts of my post-work meetups. I was working to navigate maintaining full-time, in-person operations of a public works facility while balancing the very real fear employees had when it came to their health. I carried a lot of pressure to keep my staff safe while also maintaining safe drinking water, roadways and wastewater in our town. My daily trail runs offered opportunities for me to vent, let my guard down, get some perspective from others and simply be heard. Heck, it was the one place where I was allowed to share my own fears and frustration, since I was the one on the receiving end at works when it came to concerns.
I’m sure that each of us have stories of how the trails have gotten us through a rough patch or provided much needed therapy and support. Sharing trails with friends who are going through cancer diagnoses, divorce, break-ups, miscarriages and work stress—we’ve been through it all. I remember supporting one friend through their transition as we logged long runs together. There’s something about running together that seems to allow folks to share their most intimate thoughts. I do know that the trails have provided an amazing community of support that I have relied on for years.
Photo courtesy author
Earlier this year, I lost a close friend and training buddy to suicide. He struggled with mental health and unfortunately, lost the battle. I was one of his closest friends, and a regular support system for him. We spent countless miles and hours sharing the trails as we discussed the challenges he was working through.
When he passed away, I went through the inevitable range of emotions like shock, disbelief, guilt, grief, anger and sadness. Quite honestly, I was so numb and overwhelmed that I was barely functional for nearly a month.
However, when word got out about my friend’s passing, the number of texts I received from the trail community was incredible. Many in my trail family knew of our close friendship, and that I would need comfort. They graciously provided support – from runs and hikes where they listened to me process emotions, to food appearing in my fridge and loads of hugs and notes. While I might not have fully comprehended the impact of these acts in the moment, reflecting back, I truly appreciate the amazing community and associated support. I know that I would have struggled so much more had it not been for the trail community and folks dragging me out to share miles on the trails during that time. It was incredible to see that connections made on the trails had extended beyond the trails themselves.
While I am a social person, my husband is a quiet and reflective type. He might not find the support and comfort he needs in the trail community, but his mental health still benefits greatly from running on the trails. Whether it’s work stress, parent health concerns or even a disagreement between the two of us, his immediate reaction is to take to the trails. For him, the challenge of staying upright over rocky terrain while hammering his body on climbs and the views along the way, he always returns home less stressed and in a better mood. A year ago, when he was struggling with some intense personal stress, his training load increased greatly as he found every opportunity to escape to the trails.
Each of us has a story, and inevitably we have triumphs to celebrate as well as challenges to navigate. However, one thing that unites us all is the importance of the trails and the connection to our mental health. Whether you’re like me and the power is in the trail community, or more like my husband who gets support from the trails themselves—or perhaps somewhere in between—we each gain from our time on the trails. And, if the recent loss of my friend has reminded me of anything, it is to reflect on how much we benefit from our time spent outside.